Study in Red

Friday, September 19, 2014
I am granting you special access to my mind palace because guess what, there is no better venue to share all my feelings about the painful fact that I will not be able to see Janina Marie M. Aborde in NCCC anymore you are special. 

I am writing this post to justify my recent behavior and overly sad reaction to your act  writing goodbye letter, giving gift, making last appearance in CIAD and room 3 and the list of ultimate-things-to-do-to-make -Glayra-cry goes on. Selfish. Rude. Honestly, moving. I still describe the pain (you leaving) as 10.

But I could pretty sum it all up in how two years spent with you affected my entirety  life, work, lifestyle, idea of smart consumerism, decisions, love?, everything I know and believe and do not believe in. Every.Thing. Pero sige, in case you do not have any idea of the depth and scope of your impact to me, let me briefly share our story from my perspective.

If Sherlock had you at "wrong", you had me at "gist". For some unknown reason, hearing gist from you on our first conversation had me instantly screen every idea and filter every word I was about to tell you, aside from the fact that Mich did tell something to heighten everything else. So I guess you made quite a "gist-ly" entrance in my life. 

Fastforwarding to our IFCA relationship, my amazement about you has become much more than the "gist" word,  especially the time that I was closely working with you. I've gained so much confidence in myself knowing we had you leading our team. You always had this different perception that somehow set and opened our minds to new things that I could personally use someday. IFCA works because NCCC had you, I know you already know that but I am telling you this as the very first-hand witness. I have seen how you handled the project so well I wonder if you could handle IntEnt too that any hurtful remarks nga ako madunggan on how the IFCA was managed would definitely start world war 3. 

On a much more positive IFCA note, I am so thankful with the chance to be part of your team te ninz. If I would be given a chance to go back in time and correct my mistakes, I would surely make the same mistakes that led me to working with you and the entire team. SPOILER alert: my most favorite moment in NCCC is and will always be the time spent with you and the IFCA team... but mostly with you. 

I have never had a relationship close to what I have with you and yes, I agree that we are not the bestest of friends. Tinuod gud, our friendship does not require any labeling. Though, kung pangutan-on ko dili jud ko katubag kung unsa ka sa akoa, the closest word I could describe you is "special" but let other people call us bestfriends, ganahan ko. Pero this is "no demand" and I give you "no pressure" ha. nyaaaa... :))

CLIMAX alert: Honestly, I do not want to say goodbye because I feel like you are not going anywhere. True, you are moving on to another workplace but I *strongly* believe that I will see you soon. Para sa akoa man gud te ninz, our friendship has already reached such level na dili na kinahanglan magkita kada adlaw para matawag taka nga friend. But one thing is for sure, I will miss you, I miss you even now. 

This I-do-not-want-to-say-goodbye feeling is the very reason why I did not arrange a despedida party for you when I could, did not surprise you a parting gift when I already had plenty of gift ideas in mind, did not prepare a gilbert-like movie and other things we do to the leaving friend because I could not find the courage scanning through our images and captured moments together. And because doing so would confirm you really are leaving and that I'd have to say goodbye. FAIL alert: Dili ko magbabye.  

For the past month, I have been struggling to determine my future now that wala nakoy one person nga suod jud nako in a workplace, and you have set the bars so prettywow high that it would really be impossible to find your replacement I realized I do not need to be close to somebody to occupy room 3 in my heart. I guess that is the obvious downside of the Ninin Limited Edition, I could only have one version of you and our friendship. FINALE ALERT: I am guarding our friendship with my life. 

See you soon te ninz. Thank you and I love you. 

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